317: Behind The Sessions: Hyper-Independence Can Make You Anxious

Becoming a parent can bring intense anxiety and high levels of worry about doing the right thing for your child. Some people have feelings of failure in meeting some high level of expectation that they have of themselves. I always wonder in therapy what has contributed to a person’s suffering in this way, and, as a therapist, I want to dig deeper into why this style of hyper-independence and hyperfunctioning at all costs is activated when some people become parents. Let’s dig deeper in today’s Behind-the-Sessions episode. Show Highlights: How hyper-independence can show up because of childhood events in which someone experiences emotional neglect How being independent, not burdening anyone by asking for help, and relying only on oneself can be magnified in the postpartum Why the pressure to be perfect can lead to high anxiety and even depression in the presence of impossibly high standards Why asking for help and admitting that you aren’t perfect can alleviate the stress, overwhelm, and constant energy drain that a hyper-independent parent might feel How a perinatal mental health professional can help someone manage these dynamics Dr. Kat’s advice for hyperfunctioning parents: “Have compassionate support for yourself, try to be flexible in understanding that it’s okay to ask for help, and prioritize your sleep, rest, and self-care.” Resources: Visit www.postpartum.net for resources and support!  Visit www.postpartum.net/professionals/certificate-trainings/ for information on the grief course.   Visit my website, www.wellmindperinatal.com, for more information, resources, and courses you can take today!